1. Stop trying to read minds.
Most relationship problems and associated social anxieties start with
bad communication, which in turn leads to attempted mind reading. Mind
reading occurs when two people assume that they know what the other is
thinking when they don’t. This process of wondering and trying to guess
what someone is thinking is a rapid route to feelings of insecurity and
stress.
If someone says one thing, don’t assume they mean something else. If they say
nothing at all, don’t assume their silence has some hidden, negative
connotation. Likewise, don’t make the people in your life try to read
your mind. Say what you mean and mean what you say. Give the people in
your life the information they need, rather than expecting them to know
the unknowable.
It’s also important to remember that you aren’t suppose to know every
little thing going on in the minds of others, even the people closest
to you. When you stop trying to read their minds, you really begin to
respect their right to privacy. Everyone deserves the right to think
private thoughts. Constantly asking, “What are you thinking?” can
provoke a person to withdraw from a relationship to find space.
